Sunday, October 19, 2014

THROWBACK 28/06/2014

28.06.2014

Happy 23rd Birthday to me
i never though i got surprise party on that day
it was really amazing
i am speechless when they shout happy birthday
thank you dear for making me happiest person ever
i will not forget all the memories


i was down few days before my birthday
involve in an unexpected accident
lose something precious in my life
but shit happen
im glad you are there for me
through thick or thin of life
thank you for the surprise
how can i not love you dear ?
you are the first one who stubborn to make birthday surprise for me
bringing me all the way from KUL to PEN
to our favorite beach
remembering all the days we dated 
and just sat there look at the star and waves
it is really peaceful
thank you for showing me how much i can love a person
i wish i can do all good thing and never let you down
i am sorry for not being there for your birthday party
for not being there on the day you birthday
i am useless
i really hope you will like my present
and everything i bought for you
i love you NUR SYAHIRA BT MOHD SAHARI


Friday, October 17, 2014

even though it hurt i'm still happy :')

2014
''Its the year of full of joy, laughter, sadness, hurt, happiness,
its the year that somehow change me a lot.''

i used to be a person who never care about others,
a cold person,
a kind of person who take love for granted,
a kind of person who never appreciate someone,
a kind of person who is too choosy, 
a show off kind of person,
a person who love partying with drugs,alcohol and women.
but,
something happen early this year
i feel very committed towards something,
i know that i need to set some good example for other people,
slowly i care about all the people who care about me,
i've shown more love than before,   
i'm beginning to smile more than ever,
i learn how to appreciate all of their sacrifices and make mine for them,
i am not too choosy nowadays,
didn't show off but i am friendly and willing to share everything i know with everyone,
i became very friendly,
though its hard at first i manage to slow down on partying and stop illegal used of drugs,
i didn't go out and play around with women anymore,
and the biggest achievement is i am rarely drinks alcohol nowadays.

I still don't have an explanation for what happen right now,
this is the first time i am willing to do anything for someone,
that someone who opened my heart to love,
even though its not the first time i fall in love,
this is the first time i am ready for commitment,
its nice to be in love even its for awhile,
it is even better to cared for someone special,
to be protective kind of person,
to put someone first in my life,
to make them smile everyday,
even though lots of thing happens,
i never give up,
this is the best fighting spirit i ever had for someone,
She might not realize it, 
she might think i'm not happy with her presence,
but,
i do love everything she did that make me even better person that the past me,
even though there's a part of cries, hurt, sadness, depression,
i still want to go for it,
the first time thinking about marriage,
i am glad that god give me the most precious give in my entire life.
Thank You dear for this untold special feelings.

On this post also, i would like to say that i will be away for quiet some time,
its not i'm running away from all the problems,
it is because i am weak now,
i am too depress,
i am half crazy right now,
i can't think straight right now,
i need to find peace,
i need to find back my strength,
because all the piece of me is broken and shattered in million pieces,
i'll find my way back up,
i'll find a new place with no memories and pain.
i wish she will always be there, but its my mistake i expect too much from impossible situation.

Thank you for this amazing roller coaster ride
Nur Syahira

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Thank You

I REALIZED EVERYTHING
I'M NOT TOO DUMB NOT TO SEE IT
YOU ARE REPLACING ME
I COULD FEEL IT
IT IS HURT 
BUT YOU NEVER CARE
MAYBE WHAT PEOPLE SAY ABOUT YOU IS TRUE
YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO USE ME
YOU NEVER LOVE ME AT FIRST
I AM THE ONE WHO HOPE TOO MUCH
THANK YOU
I WILL GO FAR AWAY FROM YOU AND HIM

Sunday, October 12, 2014

Happy Birthday

13/10/2014
Today is an important day for me
because
it is the day that my other half was born in 1992
Her name is Nur Syahira bt Mohd Sahari
I would like to take this opportunity to tell the world that
She is my happiness
my sadness
my joy
my laughter
my pain
she is my everything
and i love her very much
more than anything in this world
she meant the world to me.


On this special day
i would like to wish her all the best in her career, always stay strong,
stop depending on others who is trying to use you, smile always, always be nice to people but not to dumb to trust everyone, remember your family and everyone who sacrifice for you till you reach your dreams

"Dear, remember that if you be with someone who have money and willing to spend all for you, that is great but remember if they can buy you cheaply they can bought other girls easily"

"being on the city you might think you know everything but you dont know how city life can destroy you, remember when we sat on a bench at Gurney penang that night you honest with me about your past regarding mens ? you wanna know why i am being too protective ? because i dont want it to be repeated again, you are not young anymore, and i am here for you just to make you realize how much i hurt, sad, cries just to make you happy, please appreciate me who willing to do everything for you since the day we met."

Thank You for the love you showed to me
i forgive you for all your lies
i hope you know why i am still here for you after all this hard time


Thursday, August 14, 2014

I love you ; I miss you ; but i knew that i've lose you



'' One Half of me is yours, the other half is yours, mine own, i would say ; but if mine, then yours, And so all yours''

i miss you so much
i wanna hug you 
i wanna smile for a reason
i wanna love and to be loved again
but i knew i have lose you
i am regret
but i know i'm not your man now
you're happier with him
i love you NSMS

Sunday, July 6, 2014

HURT


Truth is everybody is going to hurt you.
you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.

But

are you worth it suffering for dear ?
you only knew your suffer but you didn't knew what I've been through
with all the beating, biting
emotionally abuse
i am still here for you
helping you with all your problem
been there through all the mess
still i manage to love you
maybe i am love you too much
and expect too much in return
maybe if i died one day you will realize how much i love you

Wednesday, June 25, 2014

beauty in the breakdown

Always remember that everything that related to happiness will knock us upside down,
take your time and be sad for the people or unfortunate even,
because
how far we go, 
how ugly we cry,
how hard we try,
remember,
Theres a Beauty in the Breakdown

goodbye

we will face up and down
its a normal process of living the life
theres a part of life for goodbye
for everything that build us and eternally tear us apart
G-O-O-D-B-Y-E

where can i go ?

families,friends,girlfriend
i never good in mixing around
i fake a smile since i was a child
i never found my happiness
i got no place to share my emotion
i got no one who willing to listen to all my joy and tears
maybe
the world was too big for me
too big for a guy who will never be happy

puzzle

i thought you're the one,
the missing puzzle of my life,
yet you destroyed me with all your words,
the way you mingle around with other boys slowly kills me,
i hope you are happy with what you did
because
i promise you
you will never ever find a guy who love you like i do

Birthday ?

I am lost in the ocean,
full with fake people,
with the way they act like they cared for you,
but in reality they don't,
somehow i fall easily for the bullshit promises,
birthday was never fun for me,
i miss blowing the candle on top of the birthday cake,
in fact i miss being happy,
i try hard to pleased everyone,
but never expect that i am played this way,
celebrating birthday alone was like a routine for me now,
maybe i am destined to be alone forever,
it is like a curse,
curse of a demon inside of me.

Happy 23rd Birthday to me.

Monday, June 16, 2014

LOVE




"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage" 

dear, i know its hard for you to love me
its been harder for me since all the thing you do reminds of your past with your ex's
i know he's been a better partner to you
but i can promise you one thing that you won't find someone who loves you like i do.
i am still trying to be better
to gives you everything you wanted
to give you courage to fight for what we dreamt of
because i still remember the first time i saw your eyes
i saw a future of me and you
thats the reason why i can't go even though you wanted to go
loving you was really hard for me
everything i do seems wrong to you
i cared too much for you
till its makes you uncomfortable with me
i hope one day you will realise that i truly loves you for who you are
and i am sorry for all the things that i've done
the things that hurt you the most
i am deeply sorry for not being a perfect boyfriend who won't let you down or see you in trouble
I love You
Take Care love

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

You are my queen


I know that our relationship sometimes might go up and down,
I realise of my fault and my attitude,
Even though some fact might hurt our feeling, or sometimes we might think that we are not gonna long lasting in this relationship.
How much we fight and argue in the end we forget everything that make us sad,
Hence we remembered everything that make us happy because i believe that how far we apart from each other, how many guys or girls try to flirt around with us, we forget them put the problem aside and start love each other.

Hopefully we will be much more better in the future, much more happier than now, and keep praying to god that our dream will become reality.

I love you sayang ❤️

Saturday, May 10, 2014

First Date



Our first date in KL
you've stay with me for 3 days
i was really happy 
we went to PELITA KLCC for lunch
we've ate ayam masak kicap favourite you
the we went to KLCC to meet up with bubu and others
i rindu waktu tu
you sayang i without any regrets and condition
i am not a good guy
but i will slowly change for you my sweet lil princess
I Miss You :')

Thirst 2013

Thirst 2013


This is the first event we went together as a couple
if you still remember kita tak leaps berkepit 
maklumlah rindu kan ;)

i was so happy that time
the person i love the most is by my side
i never feel so complete before this
but when you entered my life
you complete me as a man
you are the other part of me
thanks sayang always be there for me

How we met

30 November 2013



The first day i saw you eye to eye,
i'd never expected that i could fall so deeply with you 
i Still remember the spot we met at this musical event AViCii
you were beautiful as usual
i can stop starring your eyes
its so bright till you take my heart away
i still remember holding your hand for almost 10 minutes till i left
i wanted to tell that i fall for you since the first day i met you
i love you